#gary carp

[mariocki]

Six Plays by Alan Bennett: All Day on the Sands (1.6, LWT, 1979)

"Look at the level of that sauce. Only started yesterday, it's gone down dramatically. I'm under no compulsion to provide sauce. Lathering it on. It's not as if my cooking needed sauce!"

"Make it available on request. Sauce available on request, that'll bring them to a sense of responsibility."

"Wouldn't care, but they go at the salt and pepper like lunatics. You'd think they'd never seen a cruet in their lives."

[sadgoosehours]

We’re stealing Babygirl from Gary Whorley’s terrible Top Gun 2 script, she’s mine now. Anyways she totally resigns from the Navy, becomes a firefighter, adopts a dog, and raises her kid happily away from Sparrow.

[kwebtv]

Martin Eugene Mull (August 18, 1943 – June 27, 2024) Comic actor whose career included contributions as a musician and painter. He became known on Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman, its spin-off Fernwood 2 Night, and America 2 Night. Other notable roles included Colonel Mustard in the 1985 film Clue, Leon Carp on Roseanne, Willard Kraft on Sabrina the Teenage Witch, Vlad Masters / Vlad Plasmius on Danny Phantom, and Gene Parmesan on Arrested Development. He had a recurring role on Two and a Half Men as Russell, a drug-using, humorous pharmacist.

In late 2004 and in 2013's Netflix-produced Season 4, Mull portrayed Gene Parmesan, a private investigator, on the TV series Arrested Development. From 2008 to 2013, he had a recurring role on the show Two and a Half Men as Russell, a humorous drug-using and selling pharmacist. During 2008 and 2009, Mull guest starred in two episodes of the television series Gary Unmarried, as Allison's father. In 2015, he appeared in two episodes of the TV series Community as George Perry, the father of Britta Perry. He also starred in the Fox television sitcoms Dads (2013-14) and The Cool Kids (2018-19), the latter with David Alan Grier, Vicki Lawrence, and Leslie Jordan. In 2016, Mull appeared as guest star in the satirical TV series Veep, a role that earned him an Emmy nomination. His later credits included The Ranch, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, and Bob's Burgers.(Wikipedia)

IMDb Listing

[discluded]

The latest standard pop article refers to Chat and Khem's relationship as a bromance at this rate by the end of this leg of the press tour they will be referred to as brothers 😂

Hey, I'll coalesce these together then, if that's OK. For folks who want to, feel free to use this as a discussion post.

I've had a really long week, I've taken two different cats to the vet since Sunday so I'm not really in the mood to stir up more drama-- but... *makes grand gestures*

1.

I think the initial reaction to Pond's comment might have been overblown in the sense that it should have been something, given Pond's history of saying shit, that could be ignored. I'm perplexed by Man Suang comms account's decision to double down on this by posting the image with "Man Suang is not a bad movie; Man Suang is not a BL". Since most of the account's followers are already MileApo/Man Suang fans, I'm not sure what they were hoping to accomplish with that statement that could easily be taken the wrong way. Pond needs to say less. But I've also given up on analyzing the state of their PR/comms.

2.

It is somewhat telling to me that many people who are upset about Pond's comment and the account's statement and general straight washing of the movie are queer, though specific reactions range from actively angry on social media, quietly angry in closed fannish settings (chat, circle, servers, etc), attempt to placate other fans with empathy, or just apathetic towards the point of disengaging [read: me, due to other stress in my life]

Meanwhile, I haven't seen a single queer person go THEY NEVER PROMISED YOU A BL NEVER SAID THEY'D BE A COUPLE OR QUEER YOU'RE THE ONES WHO MADE THAT ASSUMPTION 🤪 So.

First to that--

Strawberry had shared this translation.

I realized, watching it back, this is what the autocaptioning(?)/Mint translator subbed it with:

I'm not sure if it's the lack of clarity in Thai that can be translated either way or the Mint team's translation is less specific while , but Apo also explicitly discussed that he played Khem as closeted, and it does a disservice to Apo's intentionality for the character to straight-wash the movie.

I think ultimately it depends on how one defines BL. From the classicist (ha!) perspective of the origination, BL has specific target demographic audience and definition.

Let's take these specific notes, with citations in the wikipedia entry itself:

Yaoi also known as boys' love and its abbreviation BL, is a genre of fictional media originating in Japan that features homoerotic relationships between male characters. It is typically created by women for women and is thus distinct from bara (gay manga), a genre of homoerotic media marketed to gay men. "BL" is the common term used to describe male-male romance media marketed to women in Japan and much of Asia, though its usage in the West is inconsistent.

Given these specific definitions, I would actually agree without criticism that Pond is correct that Man Suang is not a BL in the same way it takes me out when people call CMBYN a BL because that is not its genre/target demographic. I would agree Man Suang is more arthouse film like CMBYN or Carol or Moonlight, or if we're going back farther, more popluarist like LOTR or Memoirs of a Geisha or Crouching Tiger. Of course these might be different genres, but idea of a popularist film is mean to be watched by everyone, not pushed to a specific demographic (vs. for example, Marvel which is marketed towards boys and young men, but is watched by the general public.)

Similarly, back to the origins of the BL genre, queer romances and queer main characters are not solely limited by the genre of BL. Even aside from Bara, there is Josei as a genre where notable works include Sakura Gari by Yu Watase (author of Fushigi Yugi and Ceres Celestial Legend) and The Carp on the Chopping Block Jumps Twice / The Cornered Mouse Dreams of Cheese. In Seinen, there is My Brother's Husband (the mangaka is a very famous Bara author). If you haven't heard of these, that's fine, but I'm serious about how much extensive understanding I have about the delineation about the nuances of what is "technically" BL and what isn't.

There is a disconnect in the audience's definition and what BOC is trying to communicate, and that's why friction is occurring.

That being SAID, AND VERY IMPORTANTLY, let's again recognize that the definition is about the target audience being young women, and the insistence and tone of which the marketing is pushing how it's NOT for the BL audience (young women) but to everyone is quite boldly misogynist for a company that built its foundation on female consumers. Its tone is overtly that something which is made for young women is somehow inherently "not good", the same way that romcoms are somehow less valuable as art, or boy bands or handsome young singers like Justin Bieber are less talented musicians because of its target audience.

So yes, I do have a problem with the tone they're taking and I think the biting the hand that feeds it comment is spot on.

3.

Finally, about Apo tweeting and deleting. I think he held and articulated himself well in interviews, and he's been insanely patient and tolerant these past few weeks (see: laris). I actually really relate to him in that sense because I can be calm and rational but sometimes I can't help but run my mouth. I held off on answering these because I've been so stressed and just couldn't handle whatever anger it might rile up.

Expecting someone to hold their temper 100% of the time is impossible even if they manage it 99% of the time. I've also tweeted angry things I've deleted in minutes later too. And I understand his perspective in not wanting to be limited to the genre or audience of the art he creates. So Apo's (valid and expected) reaction is understandable.

--

If it's okay, I'll probably not answer any more asks about this topic for probably a while. I have some other family stuff going on (not-cat family) and I just can't deal with people who don't have to be in my life causing this nonsense while I also have to deal with people (and cats) I can't get rid of attachments to also having stuff going on.

[smashpages]

Out this week: K Is In Trouble (Little Brown Ink, $13.99): 

Gary Clement writes and draws this graphic novel about a kid named K who always gets into trouble, whether he deserves it or not. “No matter what he does or says, it seems there is someone ready to blame him for everything. K is in trouble for going to school. K is in trouble for staying home. K is in trouble for running an errand, getting sick, or just being thirsty. K gets into trouble with imperious crows, persnickety station agents, bombastic teachers, his own classmates… even one nice fresh carp.” I think we all know how you feel, K.

See what else is coming to a comic shop near you this week.

[zikriedwan]

Rekomendasi Carpet Gelanggang Badminton PALING BERKUALITAS!!!

Rekomendasi Carpet Gelanggang Badminton KLIK https://wa.me/6281318883437, Mau tau informasi lengkap tentang Karpet Lapangan Badminton Yonex, Karpet Badminton Surabaya, Karpet Gelanggang Badminton, Karpet Badminton Jakarta, Karpet Badminton Lining

Bahan Carpet Gelanggang Badminton

Lantai lapangan bulu tangkis yang dibuat dari bahan karpet sintetis sering disebut dengan porta court. Karpet sintetis yang sering digunakan dalam ajang bulu tangkis resmi terbuat dari bahan vinyl.

Spesifikasi Carpet Gelanggang Badminton

1 lapangan 4 roll dan 1 roll ukuran ( 1.8m x 15m ) dan tentu dalam luas satu lapangan 108m2 dan tentu sudah termasuk material pemasangan karpet badminton.

Material Pendukung untuk lapangan badminton yakni :

1 welding rood

Include Jasa Pemasangan Karpet Badminton

Perlu diperhatikan produk yang kami hanya produk original yang tentu nya dengan produk vinyl lapangan badminton yang bagus dan berkualitas tinggi maka dianjurkan anda bisa tanya mengenai informasi seputar karpet lapangan bulutangkis disini.

Pengiriman Menggunakan Pick up untuk 1 lapangan karena bobot yang sangat berat per roll nya.

Sebelum Anda Membeli diHaruskan Untuk Mengetahui Terlebih Dahulu Penjelasan Kami dari Barang dikirim Hingga Pada Proses Pemasangan Karpet lapangan badminton agar kondisi yang akan anda terima sudah jadi terpasangan dan juga siap digunakan di gor lapangan bulutangkis yang anda miliki.

Dan Kami Juga menerima skala pemesanan besar seperti sekali order dengan jumlah 10 lapangan badminton atau lebih dan siap kirim ke seluruh wilayah Indonesia dan sekitar nya.

Jenis Carpet Gelanggang Badminton

Ada beberapa jenis karpet badminton yang terkenal dan juga kami sediakan, diantaranya Carpet Gelanggang Badminton Flypower, Yonex, Lining, Alite. Merk merk tersebut terkenal memiliki harga yang cukup mahal sehingga anda bisa mempertimbangkan merk lain untuk menyesuaikan budget yang anda miliki. Merk karpet badminton lain contohnya Alite, Benow, Enlio.

Keunggulan Carpet Gelanggang BadmintonSintetis Untuk Bulu Tangkis

Bahan karpet sintetis dari vinyl sangat fleksibel untuk digulung dan pasang ulang di tempat yang datar. Selain itu, karpet sintetis lapangan dari vinyl punya daya cengkeram yang kuat sehingga tidak licin untuk sepatu badminton.

Keunggulan vinyl lainnya adalah mampu menyerap pantulan cahaya dari atas atau berbagai sisi lainnya. Sehingga, pemain tidak merasa silau ketika bertanding. Dalam ajang resmi BWF, warna karpet sintetis lapangan bulu tangkis bisa berbagai macam mulai dari hijau, biru, dan merah.

Ukuran Lapangan Bulu Tangkis Tunggal Panjang garis lapangan permainan bulu tangkis dalam partai tunggal adalah 13,40 meter Lebar bidang permainan: 5,18 meter Panjang bidang penerima servis: 4,72 meter Lebar bidang penerima servis: 2,59 meter.

Ukuran Lapangan Bulu Tangkis Ganda Panjang bidang permainan: 13,40 meter Lebar bidang permainan: 6,10 meter Panjang bidang penerima servis: 3,96 meter Lebar bidang penerima servis: 3,05 meter.

Ukuran Carpet Gelanggang Badminton

Ukuran yang diperlukan yaitu 7,5meter x 14,5meter untuk keseluruhan pasang 1 lapangan badminton.

Perbedaan produk 4.5mm dan Lining 5mm?

Tentu perbedaannya sangat jauh karena produk 4.5mm ketebalan dari spesifikasinya lebih tipis ketimbang 5mm dan produk Lining Original lebih unggul dari motif karpet badminton serta ketahanannya.

Cara Pasang Carpet Gelanggang Badminton

Tak Membutuhkan Waktu Lama untuk Melakukan Pemasangan Carpet Gelanggang Badminton

Untuk bisa menyelesaikan pemasangan Carpet Gelanggang Badminton, kami hanya membutuhkan waktu kurang lebih 4 jam saja sampai benar-benar selesai dan langsung bisa anda gunakan. Tak perlu khawatir, kecepatan yang kami tunjukkan tersebut bisa dipertanggung jawabkan. Karena dari segi pengerjaan sangatlah rapi dan terjaga kualitasnya. Hal ini dipengaruhi oleh semua pekerja yang melakukan pengerjaan adalah tenaga ahli, profesional dan berpengalaman di bidangnya.

Cara Pasang Carpet Gelanggang Badminton

Beberapa proses pemasangan yang wajib anda ketahui agar anda puas dengan kinerja kami, antara lain: 1. Lakukan Konsultasi Terlebih Dahulu Proses pemasangan karpet lantai bulutangkis diawali dengan melakukan konsultasi terlebih dahulu agar kami tahu apa kebutuhan dan keinginan anda sehingga kami bisa memberikan solusi terbaik atas masalah yang mungkin dialami.

2. Pengecekan Area yang Akan Dipasang Pengecekan tempat dilakukan untuk mengetahui seberapa sulit medan yang akan kami kerjakan sehingga sudah bisa diantisipasi sejak dini. Dengan memahami medan, proses pengerjaan pun bisa berjalan dengan lancar.

3. Pemilihan Bahan yang Tepat Selanjutnya pemilihan bahan yang tepat harus diperhatikan agar hasilnya sesuai dengan keinginan dan bisa meningkatkan kenyamanan saat bermain bulutangkis. Anda bisa memilih sendiri ataupun mengikuti rekomendasi dari tim kami. Pilihan bahannya antara lain:

Crystal Sand

Gems

Training Gems

Training Crystal Sand

Snake Skin

Liche

Coral

4. Proses Pengerjaan Pengerjaan dilakukan dengan membuat rencana kerja terlebih dahulu. Jika semua persiapan sudah selesai dilakukan, pengaplikasian langsung ke tempatnya akan segera kami lakukan sesuai dengan jadwal yang sudah disepakati. Dalam waktu kurang lebih hanya 4 jam saja, kami akan segera menyelesaikan lapangan bulutangkis yang anda pesan.

5. Quality Control Tahapan terakhir yang akan tim kami lakukan adalah dengan melakukan pengecekan final (Quality Control) untuk memastikan tidak terjadi masalah pada karpet lapangan badminton yang kami kerjakan. Selain itu anda juga akan mendapatkan garansi selama 30 hari khusus untuk bagian sambungan yang terlepas atau pun rekatan yang tidak sempurna.

Cara pasang karpet lapangan bulutangkis di atas yang sudah memenuhi standar internasional tentu akan membawa keuntungan bagi anda. Segera pesan dan buktikan sendiri kualitasnya.

Daftar Harga Carpet Gelanggang Badminton

Harga Carpet Gelanggang Badminton 1 Roll : Rp 6.050.000,-

Harga Carpet Gelanggang Badminton Murah 1 Lapangan Badminton : Rp 24.000.000,-

Harga Carpet Gelanggang Badminton Merah 1 Roll : Rp 6.100.000,-

Yuk Kenalan dengan Kontraktor Futsal Indonesia https://www.kontraktorfutsalindonesia.com/

Untuk Lokasi kami ada di https://goo.gl/maps/jFCguo1xhi2RBTth9

[whatisonthemoon]

Philippine Members Assigned to Serve “VIPs”

The Unification Church has been criticized in the Philippines for the ways its pursues influential figures, especially military and government figures, paying them to speak at or even attend their conferences, and assigning them volunteer assistants. This was a similar strategy to the Unification Church in Japan and the early Unification Church in DC. 

The following was written by a Philippine member Irma Balulot in 2009 regarding the VIP Providence, all bolding added for emphasis:

The work of God started from God. Yes, people are critical, but the beginning and the end of it all is God. Now it is fully manifested in the True Love, True Life and True Lineage of True Parents, despite some confusion, God's Will is done.

The claim that there is a lack of capable leaders in the Philippine Movement is self-serving, especially if it comes from a leader.

The VIP providence in the Philippines did not start 10 years ago -- it started 20 years ago with Mr. Murotani, Phillip Schanker, Gary Fleischman, Gerry Servito, Roger Johnstone and Ulrich Volkel.

Assisting those very sincere and hardworking elder members were the very capable Dolor Benitez for PWPA, Joy Pagaran Theriot for CARP, Jacob Amamio for the Medical Team and me for CAUSA. We were not alone though, there were countless members who toiled and served VIPs so that we can touch their lives and we become the living witness to the trueness of the Divine Principle and of True Parents.

In mid 1990s, I was again one of those members who were with the Kims in breaking headways for the VIP activities. Yet, none of us ever have the courage to claim that the VIPs now are there because of us. Or because they saw Gen Magsino, Gen Bumanglag and Gen Canatoy, who were in the forefront of the VIPS at that time. Why? Because the most painful path are those of the members who needed to raise funds to support the activities -- led by Romy Nuyana and Jun Basuil. The members from the provinces who need to be herded to Manila in order to support the VIP providence. The nameless members all over the world from whose sweat and blood the money to support the activities were drawn from. All of these, without which nothing would move.

Did the providence stop when these people disappeared from HQ? No, why?

Because at the core of all this is that all of our efforts are our offering to Heaven. God Himself will continue the work through those who sincerely serve Him and True Parents.

So personally for me, it is highly preposterous for anybody at all to make a claim that what is now seen in the Philippine Movement is only because of a few. Worse, what is seen now may not even be true. Take away the overflowing money and see what will be left.

Another issue is what type of leadership and management have they done if it is indeed true that it is only them who could handle all the different management functions?. In organizational study, if troubleshooting is always needed, that means there is no management, no leadership.

Jun Basuil is highly capable to lead the movement. Also, give positions of leadership to young members -- they might even do a better job than many of us could do.

Let us start again in humbly bringing offering to God, True Parents and True Children.

Merry Christmas to all!

Sincerely,

Irma

[darkangelfirefighter69]

🖤 Carpe Diem ❤️‍🔥

[fatehbaz]

hope these might be interesting. round 1. round 2:

Titles and short descriptions below:

-- The Platypus and The Mermaid: And Other Figments of the Classifying Imagination (Harriet Ritvo -- 1998 -- The Victorian-era craze for taxonomic classification, dichotomies, human-animal separations, monsters, and hierarchization of animals among formal institutions, naturalists, Euro-American scientists, etc. Showmen, media, scientific professionals, and folk cultures vying to establish hierarchies and definitions of life through language and animal-naming systems.)

-- An Ecology of Knowledges: Fear, Love, and Technoscience in Guatemalan Forest Conservation (Micha Rahder -- 2020 -- Human and other-than-human relationships, multitude of knowledge systems vs. monoculture of knowledge, the tension and negotiation between multiple coexisting “ways of knowing the world,” and conflicts involving dispossession, extractivism, state violence, Euro-American conservation groups, and local Indigenous people in the Maya Biosphere region of Guatemala.)

-- Tropical Freedom: Climate, Settler Colonialism, and Black Exclusion in the Age of Emancipation (Ikuko Asaka -- 2017.)

-- Radical Botany: Plants and Speculative Fiction (Natania Meeker and Antonia Szabari -- 2019 -- “Imagining new worlds” in contrast to modernity, dualism, and rigid distinctions and hierarchies between human and other-than-human by engaging with plant lifeforms.)

-- Trash Animals: How We Live with Nature’s Filthy, Feral, Invasive, and Unwanted Species (Edited by Kelsi Nagy and Phillip David Johnson  -- 2013 -- Uncomfortable or unsettling interspecies relationships; includes writing on wolves, carp, rattlesnakes, pigeons, etc.)

-- Singing the Turtles to Sea: The Comcaac (Seri) Art and Science of Reptiles (Gary Paul Nabhan -- Comcaac relationship with reptiles of the Sonoran Desert and Gulf of California.)

-- Colonial Botany: Science, Commerce, and Politics in the Early Modern World (Edited by Londa Schiebinger and Claudia Swan -- Anthology of articles/essays about the central role of plantations in imperialism and the role of botanists as “agents of empire”, edited by one of the field’s most respected scholars, Schiebinger.)

-- Zoontologies: The Question of the Animal (Edited by Cary Wolfe -- 2003 -- Collection of a few essays about the boundaries and borderlands between the animal and the human.)

-- No Species Is An Island: Bats, Cacti and Secrets of the Sonoran Desert (Theodore Fleming -- 2017 -- Text and illustrations exploring the decade-long research into nighttime lives of bats, moths, and cacti in the Sonoran Desert. With info about the relationship between moths and senita cactus, and the essential role of long-nosed bats in pollinating cacti.)

-- A World of Many Worlds (Edited by Marisol de la Cadena and Mario Blaser -- 2018 -- Anthology from multiple scholars about different conceptions of ecology/the cosmos and the tension between Indigenous and Euro-American scientific ways of knowing, with extra focus on multispecies worlding/ways of knowing from Latin America.)

-- Images of Animals: Anthropomorphism and Animal Mind (Eileen Crist -- 1999 -- How language and animal-naming conventions are not innocent or neutral; how language used to describe animals and their experience can deny the sentience of, autonomy of, or compassion for other-than-human creatures.)

-- The Earth on Show: Fossils and the Poetics of Popular Science, 1802-1856 (Ralph O’Connor -- 2007 -- Fun look at how the storytelling, showmanship, and display of dinosaur and Pleistocene fossils in Europe and the US reinforced existing colonial/hierarchical narratives about “progress” and had a heavy influence on how media and pop-sci disc0urses have framed science, deep time, climate change, and natural history ever since.)

-- Centering Animals in Latin American History (Edited by Martha Few and Zeb Tortorici -- 2013 -- Collection of articles/essays from multiple scholars “seeking to include” other-than-human creatures as “social actors in the histories” of “colonial and postcolonial Latin America” including writing on dog funerals, use of animal in colonization campaigns, the commodification of animals, and animals in political symbolism.

-- Unfreezing the Arctic: Science, Colonialism, and the Transformation of Inuit Lands (Andrew Stuhl -- 2016.)

[mariocki]

Play for Today: The Evacuees (BBC, 1975)

"It wasn't German, it was Yiddish!"

"It's the same thing!"

"It never is, is it mam?"

"All the Yiddisher talk Yiddish, that's why they're Yiddisher."

"It's German!"

"So it's German! Does that make it German?"

[uncle-gary-busey]

The Great Kansas Hymn with Gary Busey’s band, Carp. Recorded in 1969 or so, Gary Busey on vocals and drums, John Crowder on bass, Ron Getman on guitar, and Glen Mitchell on piano.

[kwebtv]

The Cleopatras - BBC Two - January 19, 1983 - March 9, 1983

Historical Drama (8 episodes)

Running Time: 60 minutes

The Cleopatras:

Michelle Newell as Cleopatra III and Cleopatra VII

Elizabeth Shepherd as Cleopatra II

Caroline Mortimer as Cleopatra Thea

Prue Clarke as Cleopatra Selene

Sue Holderness as Cleopatra IV

Pauline Moran as Cleopatra Berenike

Amanda Boxer as Cleopatra Tryphaena, Queen of Syria

Emily Richard as Cleopatra Tryphaena, Queen of Egypt

Francesca Gonshaw as Arsinoe IV

The Ptolemies:

Richard Griffiths as Potbelly

David Horovitch as Chickpea

Daniel Beales as Ptolemy XIII

Adam Bareham as Fluter

Lauren Beales as Ptolemy XV

Gary Carp as Eupator

Graham Seed as Ptolemy

Sadik Soussi as Memphites

Ian McNeice as Alexander

David Purcell as Alexander the Younger

Shelagh McLeod as Berenike IV

Francesca Gonshaw as Princess Arsinoe

Graham Crowden as Theodotus

Romans:

Robert Hardy as Julius Caesar

Christopher Neame as Mark Antony

Geoffrey Whitehead as Scipio Africanus

Donald Pickering as Lucius Licinius Lucullus

Phillip Cade as Gnaeus Pompey

Rupert Frazer as Octavian

Manning Wilson as Cicero

Godfrey James as Cato

Matthew Long as Ahenobarbus

Graham Pountney as Archelaus

Patrick Troughton as Sextus

Karen Archer as Octavia

The Seleucids:

Stephen Greif as Demetrius

James Aubrey as Grypus

Nicholas Geake as Seleucus

Colin Higgins as Seleucus

Donald MacIver as Alexander Zebinas

Granville Saxton as Cyzicenus

[howwelldoyouknowyourmoon]

Moon wanted a “Vast conglomerate of mutually supporting businesses”

from Donald Fraser's 1978 “Investigation of Korean-American Relations” Report

"In the future it was the hope of Rev. Moon that the Church would become one vast conglomerate of mutually supporting businesses" (p.333)

An April 1973, Directors' Newsletter—an internal publication circulated to church centers on a regular basis—conveyed announcements and instructions from Moon: He said that by April 1975, missionaries were to be sent to 120 countries and gave instructions to Unification Church members regarding the sale of ginseng tea and the importation of stone vases, both products of Moon industries in Korea; (p.334) on September 1, 1973, a newsletter reported that Gary Scharf had been appointed by "our leader" to be first head of the Collegiate Association for Research of Principles (CARP); (p.335) in a memo, David Kim repeated "detailed instructions" from Moon. Kim spoke of European fundraising units as being "under Master's direct command." (p.336) He announced that shipments of ginseng tea had been received at UC headquarters and said:

"Our Master plans to explore a worldwide market for this heavenly product, along with worldwide spread of Unification principles for mankind." (p.337)

Other memos gave instructions to UC members on how to market ginseng tea.

In a January 31, 1974 speech, Moon said: "We are going to have a strong worldwide movement. Therefore, we must have a strong worldwide organization." (p.338)

In the same speech he told his followers:

"The world is really our stage. We are going to be the ones who restore and bring hope to every corner of the world. The money is there, and I will earn that money. I will reap the harvest. And you will become soldiers, trained soldiers."

Some of the "trained soldiers" in Moon's worldwide organization were the UC members he sent as "missionaries" to various countries. In a speech quoted elsewhere, (p.339) Moon explained how he intended to use these missionaries to "open avenues to commerce" in many nations and to serve as reporters for Moon Organization newspapers in Japan and the United States. (p.340)

Moon's ability to order trained followers to undertake diverse missions around the world enabled him to bring fundraising teams to the United States and to move large amounts of cash across international boundaries. His methods for doing this were frequently illegal or questionable under U.S. law, as well as those of other nations.

___________________________________________

Investigations

Sun Myung Moon: The Emperor of the Universe, transcript and links 1. “Rev Sun Myung Moon: Emperor of the Universe” documentary
.   A BBC / A&E Network co-production, 2000 2. World Domination – Sun Myung Moon died before he could take over a single country.

Robert Parry’s investigations into Sun Myung Moon

Sun Myung Moon and the United Nations

FBI and other reports on Sun Myung Moon

United States Congressional investigation of Moon’s organization

Contents 1. Fraser Report – Conclusions and Recommendations (1978) 2. Michael Warder comment 3. Moonie “Dirty Tricks” against Donald Fraser, MinPost 2012 4. The Mysterious Death of Robert Boettcher in 1984, New York Times 5. Congressional Information Meeting on Cults 1979 6. Fraser Report: Summaries of Representative Documents including FBI Reports, State Department Memoranda, KCFF Minutes, etc. 7. Bo Hi Pak and the KCFF scam – and Sun Myung Moon’s ROFA scam 8. Bo Hi Pak and the “Unification Church Pension Fund International” 9. Minions and Master 10. Gifts of Deceit book review by Allen Tate Wood

Gifts of Deceit: Sun Myung Moon and Koreagate – Robert Boettcher

Politics and religion interwoven

The Resurrection of Reverend Sun Myung Moon

[feverinfeveroutfic]

chapter six: the black night

Sam and Alex spent about an hour of that first day in Germany there in the hotel room, away from the world, and with only each other. Neither of them were fatigued from the overnight flight. She had considered on taking her journal out for herself and for a drawing of something, much like how she made a special drawing for the show in England. But she had no idea if she should share her work with Alex, especially when he caught a glimpse of her doodling a sunflower on the inside of the journal's cover.

He sat next to her on the bed, in his little shorts, white socks, and his Gary Moore shirt, and with his legs pulled up a bit, and his hands right between his thighs. She gasped at his looking on at what she was doing and she covered up the doodle with her hand. He in turn gasped in response to that. She realized that he had seen her art but he hadn't known that it was actually her.

“Is it okay if I have a peek?” he asked her in a small voice and with his eyebrows raised which enlarged his deep eyes a bit.

“It's—It's kind of private, though,” she told him.

“I liked it, though,” he confessed, still in a small voice. “Basquiat died a few weeks ago, so I like to see another artist ascend to the position of greatness at some point.”

“I'm no Basquiat, though,” she insisted.

“Well, yeah. Every artist is unique. Basquiat was one of a kind—and even from a small sliver of a glimpse into your art book here, I can tell that you yourself are one of a kind. And that little thing you were drawing just there piqued my interest a bit. So—” He bowed his head and he raised his eyebrows even more, which softened his face to that of a young boy. “—is it okay if I have a little peek?”

He then lifted his head.

“I mean, it's only fair. You got to see the beginnings of our new album—twice! You're also seeing the transition of eras between albums.”

She swallowed and she leaned forward a bit to make sure that they were alone in the hotel room: Greg had gone off with Eric and Louie to have breakfast, while Chuck and Tiffany went out somewhere.

She then moved her hand out of the way to show him the little sunflower.

“Oh! Have you seen the painting that Vincent van Gogh did? The one of the sunflowers?”

“I have, yes! A few times, actually! It's—probably one of my favorites from him, to be honest.”

His face then lit up and he snapped his fingers.

“You know—we are in Europe, and on the western side of the Iron Curtain no less. It's not like we're back on the West Coast where you kind of have to set aside a whole few days just to go from L.A. to some place in Oregon or wherever. We can get on a train and go up to Frankfurt and visit a museum.”

“Would you take me there?” she gasped at that.

“Samantha, this is Europe,” he told her. “Ever since the war ended, they've been all about a revival of culture here. So—you know, I don't really wanna sit around here in my shorts and watch German TV all day long, either. I know you don't, too.”

“I don't,” she confessed with a shake of her head.

“Well, then.” He clicked off the television and he stretched out his long lanky legs before him. “Let me put some pants on and we'll catch the next train up to Frankfurt. It's only a few hours anyways.”

“Maybe we can go up to Copenhagen, too?”

He stopped. “If there's time today, we shall see.” He flashed her a wink and then he swung his legs over the edge of the mattress, and he walked over to the bathroom with his jeans. Sam closed her journal and she tucked her pencil right up next to the spine as she set it off to the side on the bed cover. She climbed off herself to put her shoes back on; soon he came back out with his black hair a bit more frizzy than she had seen before and a big silver skull ring on his right hand.

“I can see you being a continental of sorts, Alex,” she confessed.

“A continental?” he laughed.

“Yeah. I mean, you're smart and you're in touch with the world at large, and you like art, too.”

“I dunno,” he said with a shrug, “I feel like if you're considered a continental, you actually have to hail from the continent of Europe. Remember, the last name is not only Jewish but it's Eastern European.”

He adjusted the big ring on his right ring finger: it almost looked too big for his hand.

“Why a skull?” she chuckled at him.

“Why not?” he asked as he flashed it to her. “It's actually a symbol of life. Like a carpe diem—a reminder that the clock is ticking for me and for all of us. I also wanna think for myself, too. I've also got it on my right hand because I ain't married.”

“Mr. Swinger,” she teased him, and he scoffed at that. “You are in fact a continental!” She picked up her purse and slung it over her shoulder.

“I've got a bit of money on me,” he assured her. “It's not a lot 'cause of the whole exchange rate and everything, but it's better than nothing, though.”

“I've got money, too,” she told him as they stepped out of there and into the hallway. He shut the door and tucked the room key into his front pocket.

“Remember if someone asks us, we're just hanging out together,” she told him as they walked on to the lobby and the front doors.

“Well, yeah, of course.” He chuckled at that, and they kept on going to the sidewalk outside. Chuck and Tiffany strode back into the hotel right then.

“Where you guys going?” he asked them in a big jovial voice.

“Frankfurt,” Alex promptly replied. “Taking the train up.”

“Have fun, kids,” Tiffany said with a smile on her face.

A beautiful but gray day there in Bavaria: Alex peered up to the sky overhead with his eyes squinted and his lips parted a bit as if he yearned for a glass of water.

“Think I could've brought a jacket with me?” he wondered aloud; the hazy sunlight made his smooth skin appear even more smooth than before. The little tuft of gray almost stood straight up over his brow.

“Nah, I think we'll be fine,” Sam assured him as she took out her sunglasses from her purse and put them upon her face. They walked side by side down the sidewalk: right at the corner was the sign to the train station, across the street and down the block from there.

“The trains around here run like clockwork,” he told her as they awaited at the corner, “especially those in Switzerland.”

“Like literal clockwork over there,” she said with a grin on her face.

“Exactly!” he chuckled at that. “They're nothing like the trains or the buses back in the States.” He ran his fingers through his hair, and especially through his gray stripe. “Think it's time to dye my hair again.”

“Why's that?” she asked him.

“To rid of this little thing of gray on my head.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

“I kinda like it.”

“You do?”

“Yeah. It's interesting. Like, why is it in a single little plume upon your head like that and not all over?”

“I wish I knew,” he confessed and they crossed the street together. Once he had caught up to her, he spoke up again.

“A few years back, I was brushing my hair and I happened to look down to the sink, and I saw a gray hair there. I picked it up and I wondered where it could've come from. So I showed it to my mom and she goes, 'oh, it's probably from your dad.' But my dad's completely and totally bald, though. He hasn't had hair on his head since before I was born—at least that's according to her, anyway.”

“Wow.” Sam was stunned by that.

“Yeah, and soon another one grew back there.” She thought of the nickname she, Aurora, and Marla had given him at the Legacy shows: the boy with the pearl in his hair. “And, you know that whole thing where you shouldn't pluck gray hairs because more will grow in their place?”

“Sort of, yeah.”

“Well, my mom told me not to do it for that very reason. What did I do?”

“You plucked that one?”

“Yeah. Next thing I know, I got a whole little pocket of gray right there in a few months time.”

She laughed at that.

“And yeah—I have to confess, I'm particularly self conscious of it.”

She stopped laughing right then.

“Aw. Really?”

He nodded his head at that with a downcast look upon his face.

“It makes me look old, you know?” he continued with a lean into her own face. “Like, I'm nineteen looking on at my twenties soon. I shouldn't be going gray yet.”

“But I like it, though,” she insisted. “Like I said, it's interesting.”

He shrugged at that. “I've had people ask me if it's a birthmark, but who knows, really.”

Sam thought about the conversation that she had had with Aurora and Marla about that little pearl of gray, about the boy with the pearl in his hair. She couldn't exactly recall everything about it as he held the train station door for her.

“Thank you, dear gentleman,” she told him as she took off her sunglasses before she headed inside.

“Herr Skolnick and Fraulein Shelley,” he corrected her as he shut the glass door behind them. “That's the only German I know so far. That's according to this guy Louie talked to while we were in there.”

“Pronounced 'froy line', you said?” she asked.

“Yeah, he broke it down for the two of us, too. It literally means 'young lady.' Kind of ironic because I'm actually younger of the two of us.”

Sam giggled at that and he led her over to the ticket booth, which stood wide open just for them.

“Two single adults to Frankfurt, please—round trip,” he kindly told the man, and he took his wallet out from his front pocket.

“A combination for you and your girlfriend, too?” he asked Alex in a light German accent, and he was taken aback by that.

“Oh, she's not my—” He gestured to Sam.

“Couples get half off on the midday rides,” he continued, and Alex and Sam looked on at each other with knowing glances.

“Uh—yeah, we'll take it,” Alex told the man; and he snickered at the whole notion. “Good idea, right, babe?”

“Yeah, baby!” Sam went along with it. Alex took out a couple of euros from hiding and the man inside handed him a pair of tickets.

“For the Amerikanischer and his kleine Dame.”

“How do we say 'thank you'?” he asked the man.

“Danke schoen. 'Please' is bitte.”

“Oh, right, right, right! Uh, yeah, danke schoen.” He gazed on at Sam with a bemused look on his face, but she couldn't help but giggle at him as he handed one of the two to her. All the way towards the platform, she resisted laughing more at him. They stood there in anticipation of the train and the gray sky overhead darkened a bit with more rain clouds. Alex cupped a hand to his mouth to stifle his laughter. Sam felt her face grow warm from the feeling.

“Man,” he muttered and he shook his head.

“For real. I was not expecting that.”

He snickered some more.

“Couldn't beat that with a stick, though,” he said in a low voice.

“No way.” Sam thought of Bill right then and his incessant penny pinching. At least there she was headed into an art museum in central Germany and not a little market the size of someone's house down the street from her. There was a good reason with Alex: if she put any thought into Bill's behavior, it would ruin her day out with Alex himself.

“I got us the parlor car, by the way,” he told her; far off to his left, the silver train turned the corner on the railroad.

“Oh, you big stud!” she joked as she knew the man in the booth was still in earshot from there. He chuckled at that. The train rolled up before them and they soon boarded it one after the other. They were greeted by the warmth and comfort of the parlor car: nothing like the parlor cars back in the States for sure.

They took the spots closest to the window, but before she took her seat there, Sam spotted a small bar tucked in the far corner of the car behind them.

“Care for some authentic German beer?” she offered him with a gesture towards the bar.

“Bitte, meine Dame,” he joked, and she giggled at him and then she stopped. “Wait, that was good. You are a continental!”

The train rolled forward and she made her way over to the heavy white stone bar tucked in the corner. The female tender with the short bob of maroon tinted black hair showed her a smile in response.

“Two glasses of—ooh, Belgian beer, please,” she said.

“Two glasses, you said?” the woman echoed in a thick French accent.

“Uh, yeah—for me and my boyfriend over there,” she told her, and she had a difficult time in stifling a giggle at that. The bartender poured her and Alex a pair of glasses of that rich dark Belgian beer; when she handed the first glass to Sam, she looked behind her to the seat next to the window and gasped.

“Oh, my god, 'e is a beautiful boy,” said the woman in a hushed voice.

“Yeah, I guess he is,” Sam told her with a shrug.

“No—cherie, listen to me. 'E is a beautiful young man. I 'ave never seen a boy so beautiful as 'im.” She turned her head back in Alex's direction: the way the gray light of the day glowed back onto his milky skin so it resembled to porcelain and onto the plume of gray upon his head, and his jet black hair appeared blacker than normal. She handed Sam the next glass of beer. “You Americans—you must take care of one another and love one another. Take good care of 'im.”

Even though Alex wasn't her boyfriend, she couldn't help but wonder how much longer they could carry the whole charade out there in Europe.

“How much are these?” she asked with a gesture to the glasses.

“Five euros, s'il vous plait.”

Sam handed her five bills and then she picked up the glasses. “Is it—merci?” she asked her.

“Oui! Merci beaucoup.”

“Uh, merci beaucoup! He's learning German and I'm learning French so it—just makes sense.”

“Right? Enjoy your ride, ma cherie.”

Sam felt her face grow warm once more as she headed back to the seat across from Alex.

“Looking—as—red as a—cherry—tomato,” he stammered given neither of them were sure the woman was within hearing range of them. Sam giggled at him and he shrugged his shoulders; she handed him the glass before she took a seat across from him.

“I should tell you that this place that we're playing at this weekend, Schweinfurt—it's a few miles from the Iron Curtain. Like the border to East Germany is literally right down the street from there. I looked at it on this atlas that my parents have before we left—it's nuts.”

“Oh, wow, really?”

“Yeah—and I saw the train route while I was getting tickets in there. It's right after Nuremberg, too. We get to Nuremberg and then we hang a left and we're in Schweinfurt. Apparently, we have a stopover there!”

“Cool! So we get to see a little peek at it?”

“Exactly. Stopover there and then it's onto Frankfurt. Beyond that is Cologne and Essen, and then Amsterdam. But that's a full day's trip, though—Munich to Amsterdam.”

“Like, something to set aside for a whole trip altogether.”

“Right! We went to Amsterdam last summer for that festival that we played—you know, Eindhoven. Beautiful there. You think Germany's beautiful. I wanted to visit the van Gogh museum but we were kinda strapped for time, though.”

“Some day,” she remarked.

“Definitely, some day.” He raised his glas to her and they made a toast to each other. They took a sip of the Belgian beer in unison: nothing like any drink Sam had had back in the States, or even the cocktails that she had with Marla back in England. This was strong and full but nothing to get the both of them drunk, however.

“Oh, my god,” she blurted out as she brought a hand to her chest.

“Yeah, that's unreal.” He gaped at the sensation and rolled his eyes a bit, and she giggled at him, and he showed her a smile in return.

Within the hour, they stopped over in Schweinfurt and Alex pointed out the window. Beyond the train station was a street: off in the distance, Sam could see the pavement recede back into the heart of the city. A part of her expected to see a full on brigade off in the distance but she knew that the Soviet Union still loomed over them, and even more so from the station there at the edge of West Germany. Indeed, she spotted two men on the sidewalk wrapped in red and black overcoats and with batons latched to their belts.

“Soviets,” Alex pointed out. “See the hammer and sickle on their chests?”

Sam took a closer look: embroidered on their chests were little medallions. Even from the train window, she could make out the shape of the hammer and sickle inside there. It almost didn't even look real, even from a distance.

“Oh, wow,” she breathed out.

“I remember when we came over here last summer to play at Eindhoven festival and Louie, Greg, and I came here to Germany first before Chuck and Eric did, and I saw one of them when we got close to the border. Probably the most surreal moment of my life. It's like 'oh my god, it's real.' You know what I mean?”

“Oh, yeah!”

Those men merely stood there on the sidewalk as if they awaited something. But within time, the train rolled out of the station and westward to Frankfurt. But at that point, it was almost three in the afternoon, which meant they only had a couple of hours to relish in an art museum.

But there was absolutely nothing in the world that Sam could get past and that was the big beaming smile on Alex's face the whole rest of the afternoon.

The cold expression that she had grown almost all too familiar with had completely vanished and gave way to one of true joy. In those few hours as they walked along the cobblestones and visited a bakery for a bite of late lunch of open faced sandwiches and Black Forest cake, and then they continued on in search of the arts to nourish themselves further, every time Sam looked over at him, he looked up at all the buildings around them with a sweet smile plastered on his face. The happiest he had been up to that point, and he wasn't even with Testament right at that moment.

They were alone together in Germany and he enjoyed every moment of it.

At one point as they walked to a bookstore on a corner, she considered putting her arm around his shoulder. She had to stop herself, however: he wasn't her boyfriend.

But he certainly felt like it as she bought him a big glazed sugar cookie from another bakery.

“I'm gonna gain so much weight hanging out with you, Samantha,” he joked as he took a slow sensual bite; he rolled his eyes into the back of his head as if he experienced an orgasm.

“Get some meat on those bones,” she retorted, and the bakers laughed at that.

By the time the sun hung low over the horizon, and the gray sky began to change colors to a rich royal blue, they began back to the train station. Alex lovingly patted his stomach by the time they stepped on the platform. She had never seen him more contented as they gave the conductor their tickets before they stepped aboard. He snuggled down in the seat by the window on the right side: that time, they didn't have a table between them.

“Back to Schweinfurt!” he declared with a big beaming smile on his face.

It was the happiest she had ever seen Alex; she nestled close to him as if he was in fact her boyfriend at that point. His body was warm from the food, his face was rosy from the Belgian beer, and his hair was soft from the moisture in the gray skies overhead. Even if it was only for a few hours, she knew she had done him good that day. She had done what the bartender in the previous train wanted her to do for him.

As the train started moving, he leaned back in the seat and closed his eyes. That time there was no arm rest between them, but a bit of a divet separated their seats, so she couldn't lean all the way over to him to cuddle with him. But he was warm and full: she had to relish in the soft feeling from his body.

He gave his dark hair a little toss and he looked at her with that sweet smile still upon his face.

“Still wanna dye your hair again?” she asked him as she eyed the gray tuft over his brow. He shrugged his shoulders.

“Don't really know, to be honest,” he confessed, “after today, I just might keep it.”

“As black as the very night itself,” she whispered to him.

“As black as night—but the gray as bright as day.” He winked at her when he said that and she beamed at him.

Soon, they made their stopover in Schweinfurt and that time around, they had enough time to step off the train. Sam went on to the ladies' room while Alex made his way over to the ticket booth for a question.

She surfaced out of there when she spotted those black curls right in front of her, but without his guitar on his back.

“Hey, Joey,” she greeted him in a soft voice, and he turned his head and flashed her a grin.

“What you doin' here?” he asked her.

“Oh, just—checking the place out,” she replied; she didn't dare tell him that she was there with Alex lest he fly off the handle at the mention of his name.

“You know, we're only a little ways away from the border of East Germany,” he told her.

“Oh, yeah, yeah, I know.”

“We get any closer—goin' down this street here—we get stopped by the cops over there.” He glanced up to the clock on the far wall. “We better hustle on back to the train.”

“I should ask you what you're doing here, then,” she retorted back to him, and she couldn't resist the grin on her face.

“I'm doin' what you're doin' and checkin' the whole place out. I got nothin' better to do, to be perfectly honest wit' ya.”

“Well...” She thought about Alex in the back of the train station, and his talking to the man in the ticket booth over there.

“Well, what? You wanna mosey on back to Munich and go grab a li'l bite to eat?”

The warm, soft feeling that Alex had bestowed onto her was still powerful and she desired for more of it. “That's real kind of you, Joey, but—”

“Oh, c'mon! You're my girlfriend after all. I can't hang out with my girlfriend in Germany?”

“You have to ask first,” she pointed out with a wag of her finger. The ringing of a bell caught their attention.

“We have to get going,” he told her and he raised his dark eyebrows at her. He began towards the train outside but Alex was still somewhere back there. They were about to leave soon; she chased after Joey towards the platform.

“By the way, I should have to ask you—how'd you get so tan?”

“I got a bit sunburnt a few months ago,” he told her with a shrug of his shoulders. “It all just peeled right off and underneath was all as brown as a coffee bean.”

The soles of his shoes padded on the concrete before them and she hurried after him. She peered over her shoulder: Alex was nowhere to be seen behind them.

Joey reached out for her hand and he led her onto the parlor car of the train, the exact same car as when she and Alex rode up to Amsterdam together. He took one step onto the floor of the doorway and she followed suit. She hung there in anticipation of him. He was somewhere in there.

She would stand there and wait for him if she had to. Even if it meant blocking passengers from boarding themselves. Even if it meant throwing all of the trains completely off schedule from each other.

“Sam?” Joey called back to her.

“Coming!” she replied, and she peered out to the incoming darkness. He ducked out from the station. She recognized that little tuft of gray from afar. He craned his neck in search of her. Even though he wasn't her boyfriend, he certainly felt as such right there as he looked for her.

She waved at him so as to grab his attention. She dared not call his name given Joey was right behind her.

“Sam!” Joey called again.

“Alex!” she blurted out. “Alex!” He turned his head right as the last few passengers boarded the car in front of her. He bolted right there and ran towards her. The train was about to leave right there.

“Hey!” Alex called after her.

“Sam, c'mon!” Joey insisted and he grabbed her by the hand and he took her aboard the train. The doors closed before Alex could come on board himself. He pounded on the doors but it was useless and too late at that point. The train rolled forward right then and there.

“HEY WHAT THE FUCK!” he shouted on the other side of the glass; his big voice echoed over the train. Joey dragged her to the seats on the other side of the train, unbeknownst to it all. Sam stood there before him, unsure as to what to do next. She knew that Joey was turning a blind eye to him.

“HEY!” Alex called out and he waved his arms about. She gasped at the sight of him there on the platform with his arms straight up in the air. She turned to Joey, oblivious to what had happened.

“Oh, no,” she muttered under her breath. She knew that the next train would be there soon enough, but she still left Alex behind, and about a mile away from the border no less. At least they were still in West Germany and they hadn't crossed over the Iron Curtain at any given moment. But if what he had told her about it remained true, he was still potentially within harm's way.

“FUCK!” was the last thing she heard before the train went around the corner and away from him. Her false boyfriend left behind about a mile from the edge of the Iron Curtain, and she went with her real boyfriend at that point.

“Care for a cuppa Joey?” Joey himself offered to her with that lopsided grin on his face.

“Um—sure.” She couldn't help from feeling out the sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach, and especially the heavy feeling inside of her chest. She left Alex behind, but then again, it wasn't exactly her fault. The train was about to leave.

Their small white china cups of coffee soon arrived and Joey was eager for the first taste. She couldn't enjoy it however. She kept on thinking about Alex, all by himself at a strange train station. She also missed the nickname Joey had given the cups of coffee as well: she couldn't exactly enjoy that for herself, either.

It would be another hour and a half before they returned to the station in Munich, and all the while, she thought of him. She wanted to cry but she couldn't, not with Joey right there in front of her.

By the time they reached the station in Munich, it was almost nine thirty and she couldn't bear to look at everyone because she knew someone would ask her what happened. Lucky for her, Joey led her to a small stretch of grass right across the street from their hotel, one that overlooked a small dark lake; before them was a narrow cobblestone walkway and a few metal tables accompanied with spindly chairs. He gestured for her to have a seat on the chair closest to her.

“I'll be right back,” he told her, and she nodded at him. She sat there, all alone, in a foreign city, and she had no idea as to what to say to Alex when he showed up again, that is if he did. Surely he knew that she waited for him at the door. Surely he would understand.

Joey soon returned to her from across the street with two cups of water in hand, and he handed her the one in his left.

“So—you guys are—touring?” she started with a clearing of her throat; she took a sip and the cold feeling upon her tongue was all she needed to feel right then.

“Yeah.” Joey turned his attention to her, complete with a thoughtful look on his face. “By the way, you've been awful quiet lately. I don't ever recall you being so quiet.”

“Oh, it's—it's nothing,” she sputtered out. “I'm just—in awe of—everything.”

Something moved about down on the grass. She spotted that little tuft of gray hair over his brow. He flashed Joey a dirty look and he looked at her with a cold glare. Even from a distance, she could feel his anger. She took a sip of her water as he walked on over to the dry patch of grass down by the waters.

Joey gave his black curls a little toss back from his neck and he showed her that lopsided grin. He then rested the side of his head within the palm of his hand.

“God, you know—it really is just so beautiful here,” he remarked with a glance up to the black sky overhead.

“Yeah—it really is,” she said with a look right into his eyes. “Like—upstate, but more.”

“Right?” She looked into his eyes so she wouldn't have to see what Alex was doing. But she could still see him out of the corner of her eye. Joey peered over his shoulder to the cobblestone walkway behind him with his dark lips still upturned in a joyous smile.

Alex had taken his spot there on the grass not too far from them, and he leaned back onto his elbows and stretched out his legs. Sam wondered where exactly she had gone wrong there with him. She would have to go back to the room with him, after she left him there within range of East Germany to his own whims. She left him there all by himself and he had hardly any money of him to top it all off.

When Joey wasn't looking, she had to talk to him.

Joey himself downed the whole cup of water in four large gulps.

“Let me get you some dinner,” he offered her as he set the cup down on the table.

“Oh, no, Joey it's—it's okay. I'm not hungry.”

“What?” he asked her with a bit of a mocking tone to his voice.

“I really am not hungry.”

“Oh, come on,” he encouraged her. “Some brats and sauerkraut to fill your cute li'l belly—I wanna treat my girlfriend well!”

She swallowed as he stood to his feet and rounded the side of the table. She watched him go across the street to the cafe next door to the hotel: she watched him go inside.

And then she turned her head to the right. Alex had turned around so he could watch her from a distance.

She walked up to him and he glared at her.

“Hey—about earlier,” she started, and he shook his head and he brought a hand to his brow as if he had a headache. She swallowed. She knew she had messed up by leaving him there, and she had to face the music with him, but she couldn't resist the sinking feeling in her chest.

“Alex, listen, he's my boyfriend,” she insisted, and she could feel her stomach twisting itself into a tight knot. Alex stood upright then and he towered over her.

“I know,” he said, terse. “But what I can't understand is what you continually see in him, though. And you ditched me, too!”

She paused right there and her mouth fell dry as a bone, more dry than any alcoholic drink ever left it feeling in the past. He shook his head about at her and nothing could deny the look of disgust on his face, either.

“You,” he stammered and he grew angrier and angrier right there, right before her, “you—you—fucking ditched me right by the boundary to East Germany. You ditched me when you knew damn well that there are Soviet soldiers over that way. How—” His bottom lip trembled and his face turned bright pink. The look of anger on his face twisted into one of heartbreak. They weren't in a relationship but she could tell that she had broken his heart.

“How—How—How could you?” he sputtered and he buried his face in his hands. Sam lunged for him but he pushed her hands away from him.

“No!” he yelped with furious tears in his eyes. “No! No, god dammit!”

“Alex, listen to me—”

“How could you become the very thing you are up against!” His voice broke to where she could barely hear him.

“What?” Sam demanded, stunned.

“You behaved just like that sad sack of nothing you call a friend, Aurora. She made my birthday all about her—you made our day out all about you. How could you!”

“Don't insult Aurora like that!” she spat, but Alex bowed his head again and he ran away from her and back to the lobby. She fumed at him even though he couldn't see her. How could he compare her to Aurora! But at the same time, as she stood there on the grass with her hands down by her waist, she couldn't help but wonder exactly what he meant by that.

She had gone off with Joey and left Alex at the train station, right within range of those Soviet soldiers.

She did.

But he had no right to say that about Aurora, even after everything she had done in the past year.

But his tears told her a different story. He wept at the very notion itself. Joey had already gone back to his room as well. She fetched up a sigh.

She had dinner with Joey but she wasn't in any mood to be with him after the fact. The day was about Alex, and she had been caught up in her own unfinished business all the while.

“I might just go to bed early, babe,” she told him as Joey walked her back to the room. “I have a headache. You know, with all the traveling and whatnot.”

“Oh, of course,” he replied, still with a thoughtful look on his face. “Besides, we're supposed to be back in our rooms at eleven, and here it is ten thirty.” Before she reached into her pocket for the room key, Joey leaned forward and planted a soft kiss on her lips. A feeling that she had missed.

It felt so long ago, and yet it was all within her hands right there.

“I love you,” he whispered into her mouth.

“I love you more,” she retorted, and he chuckled at that.

“You have a good night,” he whispered again, and he gave her another kiss before she unlocked the door and headed inside. She set down her purse on the table: Chuck and Tiffany had gone out again, and Greg was nowhere to be seen, but Alex had already crawled into bed. The bed sheet hugged his slender body so she kept her eye on the smooth curvature while she changed her clothes right there next to the bed.

She rounded the foot of the bed so she could look into his slumbering face. But he rolled over before she could so much as peel back the covers; he breathed hard and heavy as she crawled underneath the bed sheet next to him.

“Alex—” she whispered.

But he never acknowledged back to her. Joey was in fact her boyfriend, but at the same time, she had left him there at the train station. He sniffled and she knew that he was crying again.

“Alex, listen,” she started right into his ear. “I'm terribly sorry about earlier. I know you're hurt and I hope you can forgive me. But as I've said, Joey is my boyfriend. I couldn't help it. I hope you can forgive not just me but the both of us. You also had no right to insult Aurora like that. Yeah, she's been a complete egotistical bitch since she got married, but I still consider her a friend.”

But he was silent still. She sighed through her nose and she lay back down in the bed with her arms folded across her chest as she awaited for Greg to rejoin them. The whole incident left her divided. Too divided to think things over and too tired to even consider the very suggestion itself.

But she managed to fall asleep before she got to see him walk through that door, and she awoke by the time he had climbed into bed next to her.

Alex was sound asleep himself. They had trapped her in bed, but she could slide down the bed to the foot. Careful not to wake either of them, she sank underneath the covers and she inched to the foot of the bed. She slithered out from under the covers and onto the floor.

There was one guy she could talk to about all of this as she swiped the key card to the room before she crept out to the hallway. She squinted her eyes against the low lights upon the ceiling. Held low against the black night outside there.

She adjusted the straps of her camisole before she closed the door behind her. All alone in the hallway there, she continued on towards the very end. Every time she blinked her eyes, there was that image of Alex crying. She couldn't shake the image from her mind. She had been a friend to him this whole entire time. She thought about what she had said about Aurora earlier as well. Still a friend, but she hadn't been one to her in almost a year at that point. He had more of an upper hand over that.

One other guy she knew she could visit, even when the going got tough overseas, right down the hall from them.

[sophia-sol]

Books I read at age 13

I was sorting through some old papers and found a list of books I read over the course of some undefined period when I was around 13 years old. A fascinating blast from the past! I wish I had more reading lists from my younger self; I only started systematically keeping track in 2009. It's interesting to look through this list and see which books I still remember with love and which ones have completely slipped my memory over the years. I had forgotten about Treasure at the Heart of the Tanglewood but I remember it being wonderful! I ought to give that one a reread sometime. On the other hand, I strongly suspect A is for Aarrgh hasn't held up, despite having always thought of it fondly. Here's what I read. The ones with an asterisk were marked as rereads. Yes I did a LOT of rereading when I was young!! *Sandry's Book, by Tamora Pierce *Page, by Tamora Pierce Lady Knight, by Tamora Pierce *Dragonsong, by Anne McCaffrey *Dragonsinger, by Anne McCaffrey Mixed Magics, by Diana Wynne Jones *Witch Week, by Diana Wynne Jones *The Lives of Christopher Chant, by Diana Wynne Jones Funny Frank, by Dick King-Smith *Babe the Sheep Pig, by Dick King-Smith *The Sign of the Beaver, by Elizabeth George Speare *The Witch of Blackbird Pond, by Elizabeth George Speare *On Tide Mill Lane, by Melissa Wiley *On Top of Concord Hill, by Maria D Wilkes *The Courage of Sarah Noble, by Alice Dalgleish *The Secret Garden, by Frances Hodgson Burnett *Sable, by Karen Hesse *Wander, by Susan Hart Lindquist *A Puli named Sandor, by Sharon Siamon The Christmas Stories of George MacDonald, by George MacDonald *Brian's Winter, by Gary Paulsen Carpe Jugulum, by Terry Pratchett Reaper Man, by Terry Pratchett The Colour of Magic by Terry Pratchett Soul Music, by Terry Pratchett Lords and Ladies, by Terry Pratchett Emperor Mage, by Tamora Pierce *In the Realms of the Gods, by Tamora Pierce *A is for Aarrgh, by William J Brooke Treasure at the Heart of the Tanglewood, by Meredith Ann Pierce Star in the Storm, by Joan Hiatt Harlow Believing is Seeing, by Diana Wynne Jones *The Homeward Bounders, by Diana Wynne Jones *Howl's Moving Castle, by Diana Wynne Jones